7. Kentucky Derby Party - May 7

At the bottom of the page click on the YouTube link to see the photos.

Sparksville comes alive every year on the first Saturday in May to celebrate the two greatest minutes in sports - the Sparksville Kentucky Derby.

Reflective of the overwhelming generosity of Dave and Murph, prominent Sparksvillinas and other notable horse-racing fans are flown in from all corners of Wingfield Springs to watch this glamorous and aristocratic event on the big-screen at JOYCE’S PADDOCK.

Keeping the face shaded and hair-do intact for the Southern Belles, one derby tradition observed by everyone is the dunning of an idiotic hat. (After watching the Royal Wedding last week, I’m convinced this hat-thing started over there). Anyway, I don’t like stupid hats, I don’t know the words of MY OLD KENTUCKY HOME (though I sometimes pretend I do), and the only sip of a mint julep I’ve taken left me gagging for a good 20 minutes. But there is a lot I like about Derby Day: good food, wine, men and song, and that’s enough to get me out of bed with a smile.

Two hours before post time, Joyce’s Paddock, on the golf course (of course) was abuzz with women clutching hats and men who don’t watch one second of horse racing on any of the other 364 days in a given year. (Because traffic in and around the Paddock was a gridlock, we arrived 15 minutes late; consequently I recommend using shuttle buses next year).

By the time I finished my camera duty all reserved seats in the Grandstands and Millionaire’s Row were taken, and the expensive Kitchen Box was reserved for pimps and movie stars, with a dress code to match. So I rubbed shoulders with the ordinary Kentucky Colonel kind of people, Southern Belles and stately gentleman in the general admission area – better known as standing room only.

After the looooooong pre-race show, the actual two-minute race was over. In other words, it’s perfect for my attention span. Actually, because I was sitting standing in the infamous infield in the Paddock area I didn’t see a single horse, but that’s okay – I can read about it tomorrow in the newspaper. Most important, I’m able to say I went to the Sparksville Derby………and that’s good enough for me.

…..one last thing, the Kentucky Derby is not, as TV announcers want you to believe, a horse race. It’s a sperm pageant. I’m telling you this so you’ll understand what goes on after the race. The 18 happy horses that didn’t win are running to become the breeding industry’s highest priced lovers studs: It’s a race whose ultimate prize is the motivation for all male competition: the opportunity to pass on their genes to as many offspring as possible. In short, the exciting two minutes on the track of Churchill Downs is just an introduction to an even more exciting two minutes (or less) on a Bluegrass Kentucky Country Farm.

I want to thank the 2 ½ people who thought I was the “Best Dressed Hat Gal”, and awarded me the grand prize of the DVD “Secretariat”. We haven’t seen the movie and REALLY look forward to a "wonderful night at home at the movies." I know both Dave and Murph had a hand in the selection, because they love me ………and I love them too. Thanks kids for the absolutely best Derby Party west of the Mississippi.

……..and congratulations to Bev who took home all the Moolah! Way to go girl!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WBE4kZN_43Q

In case you weren’t able to watch the Kentucky Derby, here’s a rather poor video clip I filmed directly off the TV sceen. No matter how often you watch it……….the winner is still………what’s his name!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=38qnW2OrPY0